Was just reading the comments I received for Talentime to see what I can work on. Seriously I am surprised but nonetheless secretly happy at some of the unanticipated stuff I see, such as the way-higher-than-expected score for Uniqueness and Showmanship. And a single line by Judge2.

"You can sing."

I can just die happyyyyyyyyyyyyyy~ Not that I haven't received such compliments before lah (humbly), but it's someone of credibility and knowledge in that field, someone who knows way more than I do, saying this.

Having said that the upcoming competition is next week, and no I'm not entirely looking forward to it. I am feeling very stressed up about it as now the other contestants are going to be the damn good ones from their halls and frankly I don't have that much faith in my abilities. Like what happened during TT - my voice cracked wtf. I was so mortified and depressed over it as such a thing has to happen only on competition day. But thankfully the judges saw it as a minor matter (from the comments). So... brings me to where I am today. But no it doesn't change my opinion that one of the guys has such an awesome voice that I can get goosebumps listening to it.

Yeah so people basically have been both intentionally and unintentionally pressurizing me about it. I don't know if it's me but I feel that my standard has kind of dipped after the competition, and my voice is taking a much shorter time to tire out and a longer time to heal. Maybe it's the stress? The fun element in singing is fading once the competitive edge comes in, and I don't quite like it. Makes me don't feel like bursting out into random song like I always used to. And hence less practise resulting in a tight throat.

My hope for next wednesday: singing without any stress, any expectations; just doing what I love - performing, with my voice as the instrument. If i do win anything it's a bonus, cos I have already gained something out of all these, which is an unfathomable experience. Never have I had people I don't know coming up to me to say they liked whatever I was doing and to keep it up. It's the affirmation that I am doing the right thing. I am amazed that I even took part in it considering I rather blend into the surroundings than be out there for all to see.

I have learnt much more than I could have hoped for. So I really wish that there will be nothing killing my interest in singing. I could ramble on and on, but I think you get my drift.

A splendid performance where the stage is my home and I give it my all.